You ain't no friend of mine *

Mary and I went to the Salisbury Festival on Saturday for an excellent concert, picnic and firework display in the cathedral grounds. I over-enthusiatically pulled on the handle of the corkscrew known as "The Waiter's Friend". Instead of smoothly removing the cork it snapped the neck of the bottle and tried to slice my finger off. I went to the St John's Ambulance for an Elastoplast® with the words of Woody Allen ringing in my head "Blood! That should be on the inside!"

* Hound Dog by Elvis Presley